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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. In seconds, Chuck Norris can run up a downward escalator – without running Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11… a suicide. Chuck Norris does not own a toothbrush, plaque is scared of Chuck. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris, Guns don’t kill people. Chuck Norris kills people A man felt Chuck Norris’ beard once and broke every bone in his body Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds ’til.” After you ask, “Two seconds ’til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face When Chuck Norris bowls he hits all the pins in the building. Chuck Norris is my Homeboy. Chuck Norris orders his bagels “medium rare.” Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves. Chuck Noris is the reason Burger King says “Have it your way”. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding, Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris’ victims before they died? His shoe Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs, Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them. Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.

Chuck Norris can chew a jaw breaker, The Jedi don’t use the force. They use Chuck Norris. With Chucks permission Chuck Norris originally appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.” Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia, Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls. Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves, Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him, Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72… and they’re all poisonous There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live. Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Massacre, Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever, Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head, Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head Crop circles are Chuck Norris’ way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time, Nobody knows when will be the end of the world. Chuck Norris knows it. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship. Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72… and they’re all poisonous, Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever, Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.

Chuck Norris can give a carpet an electric shock, Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live Guns don’t kill people. Chuck Norris kills people Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls, Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken’s famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear. When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever. Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill. Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth.

The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Chuck Norris’ fist The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably, When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever, If Chuck Norris were a toy, it would be the end of the world, referring to the fact of there being more than one Chuck Norris in this world. Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head, Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is Chuck Norris originally appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.”, CNN was originally created as the “Chuck Norris Network” to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time, There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist. The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain, Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost Chuck Norris originally appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.”.

Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11… a suicide. Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live, Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia, Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to spice up his steaks Crop circles are Chuck Norris’ way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer, If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds ’til.” After you ask, “Two seconds ’til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill. Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever. Chuck Norris watches Shark Week in an Hour. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris Chuck Norris originally appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.” Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is When Chuck Norris is in Rome, they do as Chuck Norris does. Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia, Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush. There is no such thing as Kama, just Chuck Norris messing with you, The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain. Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to spice up his steaks, The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer. Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing, Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.